Free shipping over $99 | Interest Free *no credit check* financing is available!

Closeted Military Man Reveals The Secrets Of His Double Life

by Dan Tracer February 03, 2016

Screen Shot 2016-02-02 at 12.18.53 PM

We may live in a time when gays and lesbians are allowed to serve openly in the military, but that certainly doesn’t mean coming out is everyone’s choice.

For one gay former special ops soldier and current overseas contractor, living a double life has been a more attractive choice than unifying his work/personal identities.

And while he maintains the separation is right for him (and who are we to say he’s wrong?), that much compartmentalizing can’t always be easy.

Below, he answers questions from curious minds online:

When/how did you realize you were gay? Does your family know?

I always new I was different. Through high school, a lot of people thought I was shy, boring or introverted and what not but in reality I just wasn’t interested in girls. I had a high school girlfriend, but that was because that’s just what you did in high school. After we graduated, we got married because that’s what everyone else was doing. Shockingly, it didn’t last! My first experience wasn’t until my early 20’s. It was a very confusing time for me, because I felt like I “shouldn’t” like guys. I dealt with a lot of different emotions and there was definitely an internal struggle that didn’t subside until I was able to come to terms and accept who and how I was. Even then though, I never wanted to be defined by my sexuality, so I never “came out.” I always wanted my reputation to be: “yeah, he is a solid dude..” Not “yeah, he is a solid dude…..for a queer/homo/gay/swish/etc” All that being said, living a double life and keeping secrets isn’t healthy, psychology or emotionally, but that’s just the price I felt and feel like I have to pay. It’s a trade off that I think is worth it. My father passed away a number of years ago, but my mother and siblings know. They have come to accept it, but I don’t rub their noses in it.

Are you proud of what you do or do you simply view it as a job?

Yes, I took a lot of pride in what I did and still do. Part of it is being a professional and wanting to do a good job. Part of it is that I believed in the mission. A large part of it is that I loved the guys I served with. They were and are my brothers.

How do u control your face to not betray your emotions?

For example, when you see a hot dude you might bite your lip for a second, then be like ‘Oh shit I hope no one caught me’?

I’ve always been good at compartmentalizing things. When I’m “at work” or “out with the guys” I just keep it locked down and stay in character, so to speak. The reason for that has always been my desire to be associated with being a professional and keeping my private life private.

Also, I’ve never been attracted to a guy I’ve served with, who I consider my brothers. Being attracted to one of them would be similar to being attracted to a sibling, if that makes sense.

Do the guys you date ever try and pressure you to come out?

No, I haven’t been in many LTR’s. Mostly brief flings during vacation or it’s been casual and/or discreet.

How do you go about picking up dudes discretely?

Back in the day, it was harder. Now, with online dating, it’s pretty easy. If I could get away or was on vacation, go to a bar or club.

Is you preference Twinks, Bears or it doesn’t matter?

Not into Bears, other than that it’s really about the connection. It may be conceited, but if someone isn’t in to me, I lose interest quickly.

Are you, or have you ever been in a LTR while keeping it a secret?

Yes and it is exhausting, but necessary.

I wanna a six pack. Tips?

Your body comp is 80% nutrition, so get that dialed in and you should be good to go. Stay in a caloric deficit. I’d recommend Paleo and Crossfit, but I’m biased. There are a ton of physique competitors that post composition prep diets and workouts and they will all work.

Dan Tracer
Dan Tracer


Leave a comment

Comments will be approved before showing up.

Also in Think

John Stamos Shares Steamy Shower Shot With “Scream Queens” Costar Glen Powell

by Derek de Koff September 28, 2016

So, as John Stamos’ Twitter account indicates, there was a sexually arousing shower scene in Tuesday’s episode of Scream Queens. “I think our wieners just touched, accidentally.” (was it really an accident @glenpowell ?? #ScreamQueens — John Stamos (@JohnStamos) September 28, 2016 As Entertainment Weekly reports, Stamos and actor Glen Powell shared an usually fleshy [...]

Continue Reading →

Behind The Scenes Of ‘Will & Grace’ Reunion Is A Heaping Dose Of Nostalgia

by matt baume September 28, 2016

Your love of 90s nostalgia just got triggered: the cast of Will and Grace has reunited for a video about how voting only matters in swing states, and it’s like the last 15 years have melted away and we’re all living in a world of sitcoms. Check out the behind the scenes video below for shots of the [...]

Continue Reading →

Rick Perry Danced His Heart Out In Full Bullfighting Garb; This Is The State Of The World.

by matt baume September 28, 2016

While some people were wasting their time with a presidential debate, the rest of the country was watching a far more important reality show: former politician Rick Perry doing a bullfight dance on Dancing with the Stars. The star in this case is Perry’s dance rival, Vanilla Ice, which technically, sure, he’s a star of a sort. [...]

Continue Reading →