Free shipping over $99 | Interest Free *no credit check* financing is available!

Are You Ready To See Ryan Lochte Bare It All For ‘Playgirl’?

by Graham Gremore September 06, 2016


If Ryan Lochte is looking for a way to shake off that whole Rio non-robbery scandal, he may have just been handed the perfect opportunity: Playgirl.

After lying about being robbed at gunpoint while competing in the Rio Olympics last month, Lochte issued a very long-winded half-apology on Instagram, claiming he should have been “more careful and candid” about the way he told his story. But that wasn’t quite enough to prevent Speedo and Ralph Lauren from pulling endorsement deals with the gold medalist, or stop Rio police from charging him with providing a false claim of a robbery, which carries a sentence of up to 18 months in prison.

Related: 10 Times Ryan Lochte Was A Perfect ‘Sex Idiot’

But now, after nearly a month of consistently bad news, there may be a light at the end of the tunnel for the douchey 34-year-old swimmer, because the good people at Playgirl say they would like to speak with him about a possible job opportunity.

“We are reaching out to him with an offer,” Daniel Nardicio, a spokesperson for the company, says. “Now that he’s out of his Speedo sponsorship deal, Playgirl wants to get Ryan Lochte out of his Speedos.”

He added: “We’re fully prepared to handle this ‘brah’ (as Ryan would say), and take his studliness to new heights, in a huge offer to show American men and women what Ryan Lochte really would do—naked.

Related: WATCH: Ryan Lochte Shaves His Entire Body, “Even The Bits You Don’t See!”

Nardicio went on to explain that Playgirl believes Lochte has all the right ingredients to make for an delicious online spread.

“Sexiness, athleticism and he’s totally masculine,” he said. “What he did in Rio was stupid, so we’d even offer to donate his fee to a Brazilian charity of his choice!”

No word yet on whether Lochte is even considering the offer. Let’s just hope that if he accepts he doesn’t pull a Levi Johnston.

Graham Gremore
Graham Gremore


Leave a comment

Comments will be approved before showing up.

Also in Think

Lady Bunny Refuses To Be Censored In Her Latest One-Woman Show

by John Russell September 28, 2016

Watch this video on The Scene. Wigstock founder Lady Bunny definitely doesn’t hold back in her latest one-woman show. In Trans-Jester, which premiered in April, the drag legend takes on our increasingly politically correct queer culture, embracing and re-appropriating homophobic terms, and eviscerating Caitlyn Jenner to the tune of “These Are a Few of My [...]

Continue Reading →

Calum McSwiggan Pleads Not Guilty To Lying About Hate Crime Attack, “Devastated” Nobody Believes Him

by Graham Gremore September 27, 2016

It’s been a rough few months for YouTube star Calum McSwiggan. In June, the 26-year-old internet celebrity claimed he was the victim of a violent antigay hate crime outside the Abbey in West Hollywood that allegedly left him “with three broken teeth and six stitches in my forehead.” “Last night was the worst night of my life [...]

Continue Reading →

WATCH: Katy Perry Votes Naked, Gets Arrested

by matt baume September 27, 2016

Mastermind Katy Perry’s plot has been successful! Yesterday she tweeted that she was going to use her body as click bait to change the world. And today she has made good on that threat, with a nude video about voting. Will it actually change the world? That remains to be seen. (Spoiler: no.) “This year, you can look [...]

Continue Reading →