Free shipping over $99 | Interest Free *no credit check* financing is available!

Maya Rudolph’s ‘Melania Trump Eating Diamonds’ More Relevant Than Ever

by matt baume July 19, 2016

maya rudolph

For many of us, last night was the first time we heard from Melania Trump, the woman Donald plucked from a wriggling basket to marry after growing bored of his previous conquests.

Who is this lady? Well as is so often the case, the truth is not as much fun as the myths perpetuated by former Saturday Night Live stars. (Remember “I can see Russia from my house”?) While Melania may be your garden-variety model who married a rich guy, Maya Rudolph has invented a new career for her: selling diamonds that you eat.

Related: Twitter Wastes No Time Coming For Melania Trump’s “Borrowed” Michelle Obama Speech

“I love diamond. But we all ask ourself. Why can I not eat it?” she asks in a weird skit from a few months ago. She then stuffs a handful of jewels into her mouth, chewing and purring “Yummy. Made to enjoy. Have a good time today.”

Acknowledging the role that she seems to have adopted for most of the campaign so far, Melania adds, “Gives me the energy I need to sit and wait, or stand and wait.”

Related: Watch Chaos Erupt On GOP Convention Floor As “Never Trump” Movement Is Squelched

After a while, Maya as Melania wanders over to Kate McKinnon, playing Heidi Cruz. They have a fun exchange, during which Maya seems like she is legitimately about to choke on whatever prop she just put in her mouth, and then Heidi makes fun of her accent. That detail saves the skit from descending into something unpleasant and unfunny — making fun of non-native English speakers for their accents — by turning the joke around and mocking Heidi for being THAT white lady.

All in all, a fun time had by all. After Melania’s weird performance last night, cribbing from Michelle Obama’s speech, it may be a while before we see her speaking on stage again. So enjoy the imposters instead.


matt baume
matt baume


Leave a comment

Comments will be approved before showing up.

Also in Think

New Hillary Ad Champions LGBTQ Rights

by matt baume October 21, 2016

There’s a new Hillary Clinton ad from the Human Rights Campaign, and it’s quite sweet. “Equality is about of course passing laws, but it also is changing hearts and minds,” she says. “We need to build an America where nobody has to worry that they can get married on Saturday and get fired on Monday. Where kids [...]

Continue Reading →

Let’s All Freak About Taissa Farmiga And Finn Wittrock Returning to “American Horror Story”

by Derek de Koff October 21, 2016

As SF Gate reports, Ryan Murphy announced on Tuesday that Taissa Farmiga and Finn Wittrock will be returning to “American Horror Story” in the upcoming episode of “Roanoke.” Murphy informed E! that Wittrock will be playing “the most f–ked-up character of all time.” How f-ked up? “To the point where he was like, ‘This is so crazy that [...]

Continue Reading →

Another Day, Another D-List Male Reality Star With A Video Leak

by Graham Gremore October 21, 2016

Lewis Bloor. Ever heard of him? Us neither. Until his girlfriend, Marnie Simpson, posted a video to Snapchat of him strutting around his apartment wearing nothing but a baseball hat and pair of white tennis shoes. Bloor is a 26-year-old reality star from the U.K. best known for his appearances on The Only Way is Essex and [...]

Continue Reading →