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A Gay Father’s Simple Hopes For Justice Sotomayor

by Henry Amador May 11, 2015

By Henry Amador


So I would never use the word intelligent to describe myself.
I am far from a thinker or an over analytical man.

I am much simpler than that, more basic, I’m a feeler.
I trust my gut and my instincts and I make every attempt to move away from what what I perceive as pain and move towards what my spirit senses as pleasure. The pain/pleasure principle.

I also believe in making as many decisions as I can sourced from inspiration rather than desperation.
That little concept, I believe, can change lives.

It’s naive thinking right?
Rather like the Paleo diet for the spirit, for the mind.
Clean thinking, pure decision making, healthy choices with survival at it’s core.

This simple and basic way of living and thinking works for me and for so many that I surround myself with. It helps to keep my natural and internal compass working and more often than not guides me in the right direction, at least “my” right direction.

As we look towards the immediate future the Supreme Court of the United States has some big decisions to make. The lives of countless LGBT families just like mine are depending on them.
We are depending on them to finally legalize and recognize us. To protect us as citizens and to pave the way for our children to find peace and security in this place we call home.

There are so many people fighting that battle for us, the smart ones, the thinkers, the ones that write legislation and lobby and wear the great suits and have impressive degrees and the college loans to prove it.

I am thankful and grateful for them and as much as I wish that we as a people could feel more and think less, I know that they are a very necessary and useful parts of the machine.

It’s because of those folks and that machine that my husband, son and I were recently invited to the White House for their yearly Easter Egg Roll, and because of that invitation we were able to meet Justice Sonia Sotomayor.

She’s a Puerto Rican Girl from the Bronx just like me, kidding.

I am however half Puerto Rican and was born in the Bronx, grew up on Tremont Avenue.  My mom and she could have been friends. Justice Sotomayor’s parents and my grandparents survived many of the same struggles and both raised daughters that have and continue to make this country and better place.

When we met the Justice she was first taken aback by our son’s awesome hair, she warmed up to him quickly and asked if I was his daddy, “yes” he proclaimed “and that’s my papa over there” he added.

She smiled and said “oh, I see, well aren’t you a lucky little boy.”

She posed with us all for a photo and I thanked her for all she has done.
I couldn’t help but feel that she was a friend, someone I could break bread with.

She smelled homey and unpretentious.

Her shoes were comfortable and well worn, her clothing was basic and unassuming, her hair dishevelled and slightly undone.

She looked nothing like her photos and she gave off no sense of limits or boundaries.

Don’t get me wrong, I know who she is and what she has achieved but for a brief moment we were just two people making it through a day, two spirits having a human experience, you know?
I felt like I could have said more to her, asked her to make the right decision, to stand on the right side of history, but the chance flew by me.

So I will say it here, here are my hopes for Justice Sotomayor;
I hope that when the time comes for you to voice your opinion that you think less and feel more.
I hope that you use some of your Bronx kid, gut instincts.
I hope that you listens with your heart and speak from your spirit.                                                                                 I hope that you ask yourself, WWPD, what would my parents do?
I hope that you slide that big chair of yours towards pleasure and away from pain.
I hope that your decision are based on inspiration and not desperation.
I hope that you remember our family and how my little man’s curls felt and how you said he was a lucky boy.
I hope that you keep it simple and basic and humane and that you make us all proud.

Yes, thats it, it really is as simple as that.


The post A Gay Father’s Simple Hopes For Justice Sotomayor appeared first on The Next Family.

Henry Amador
Henry Amador


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