Free shipping over $99 | Interest Free *no credit check* financing is available!

The Waiting Game: Open Adoption One Year In

by Stephen Podowitz December 22, 2014

By Stephen & Adam Podowitz-Thomas


“So when are you getting the call?”  A well-intentioned question, given that I was in the process of explaining what it meant that we’re now on the Last Minute Hospital List with our adoption agency.  But how could I explain that even being on this list might still mean months if not years of waiting?

We're practicing our swaddling technique on our cat.

We’re practicing our swaddling technique on our cat.

Since we’ve recently hit the one-year waiting mark with our agency, we had the option of going on the aforementioned Last Minute Hospital List.  This list is made up of potential adoptive parents, all of whom have been waiting at least a year, whose letters can be presented to birthmothers who have already given birth and decided to place their child for adoption.  The call can come at any minute and could require us to drive several states away, dropping essentially everything to get there as quickly as possible.
Because the call can come at any hour, Stephen and I decided it was important to buy a car seat, since most hospitals won’t let you leave without one to protect the newborn.  As we’ll discuss in another entry, we’ve decided to avoid doing much “baby prep” (setting up a nursery, buying baby clothes, etc.) for fear of jinxing ourselves, as well as the potential emotions such preparation might stir up.  But boy did the emotions get stirred up purchasing the car seat.  In a way that hadn’t happened until now, I feel like I’m really truly on the path to fatherhood.  What was formerly paperwork and ideas is now boxes and installations.  What was theoretical is now real, even if we’re minus one infant right now.
The whole process is an emotionally complicated one.  We’re excited that our lives could change at a moment’s notice.  We’re nervous about whether we’ll be good dads.  We’re anxious about making sure that bringing the baby home is a smooth process.  We’re thrilled that our dreams of fatherhood are coming ever closer.  But of course, we’re also trying to keep our emotions in check – this list doesn’t mean we’re going to get a baby any minute and we could still match the more “traditional” way, which could mean months of getting to know our birthmom match.
And explaining this all to people, even the most well-intentioned, is difficult.  We’re lucky to be surrounded by people who are incredibly supportive of our adoption journey, but it’s a foreign world to many out there.  Preconceived notions and outdated stereotypes are pervasive and we’ve spent a lot of time over the past year explaining to others what open adoption means.  The Last Minute List just adds one more detail to our story.
Christmas Tree
In the end, as the year comes to a close, we’re excited and hopeful.  Excited to be continuing to make progress towards growing our family and hopeful that the New Year will bring in a new member of the Podowitz-Thomas household.
To support our adoption journey, share our profile page or like our Facebook page!

The post The Waiting Game: Open Adoption One Year In appeared first on The Next Family.

Stephen Podowitz
Stephen Podowitz


Leave a comment

Comments will be approved before showing up.

Also in Parenting

Modern Fitness For the Modern Parent

by The Next Family March 25, 2016


Originally published on The Seattle Lesbian

By Laura King

Life can get busy. With work, kids, family commitments, friends, chores, and the general chaos of everyday life, it can be near impossible at times to sit down for a cup of tea, let alone squeeze in an hour of exercise regularly. However, all things are possible if you set your mind to them. Those that prioritize their fitness nearly...

Continue Reading →

Estate Planning: The Basics For LGBT Families

by The Next Family March 25, 2016

With the passage of marriage equality last year, laws have been quickly changing across the United States. LGBT couples with or without children weren’t just given the right of marriage, they were provided new protections and benefits within their families. All of a sudden, LGBT couples and families had to figure out how to file jointly when it came to taxes, how to add...

Continue Reading →

Representation of Modern Families in Kid-Friendly Entertainment

by The Next Family March 24, 2016 1 Comment


By Alex Temblador

I recently wrote an article for The Next Family called, “Family-Friendly Films That Feature Adoption and Foster Care,” that shared wonderful family films with adoption or foster care story lines. My reasoning behind doing so was because every family deserves a chance to see similar families like theirs represented in various forms of entertainment.

The same can be said of other...

Continue Reading →