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What I Learned from My One-Year-Old

by Danny Thomas February 19, 2013

By Danny Thomas


my one year old
taught me something today
or stirred something
reminded me of something
some primal knowledge
that my body knows
that my heart knows
but that my silly samsaric mind forgets

as we wrapped up
after the shower
she looked up at me
bundled in her towel
and her eyes spoke so clearly,
slow down and hold me, daddy

so I put everything down
put everything out of my mind
put my phone in the other room
and sat
and held her…
and I’ll be damned if it didn’t feed us both
in our soul
to our core

as I sat there I thought
how is this something we
how is this something
we need to make time for?

this is the root.
this is the core.
this is how we love each other.
we hold each other.
this should just happen.

there are a million other ways
we love our children
and most of them are the things that get in the way of holding them too…
things that take time away from stillness…
isn’t that just the dichotomy?
isn’t that just the bitch of it?

but we must.
we must make holding our children
a main concern.
holding with intention.
physical tenderness while we let the rest of the world and its worries fall away.
it is good for us all.

the other bitch of it is
it requires not just intention on our part
as parents
but openness
and listening
and awareness

we must be alert
to those moments
when they ask
not just with their words
but with their eyes
and their bodies
and their hearts…

it means we have to be patient
and vigilant…

making time

not just on our terms
when it fits
in between school
and work
and shopping
and ballet
and laundry
and homework
and dinner
and dishes
and video games…

but when it doesn’t fit…

for reminding me
what it’s all about
and giving me that
in your nursery
sharing that with me
as you fell to slumber
you asked me
just to sit with you
and not rush things
and not be distracted.
You asked me to focus on you
and be still with you
and that was pretty amazing
and a wonderful reminder.

now I need to make sure it happens with your big sisters too.
and your mom.
and the trees.
and the river.
and the sky.
and the moon.
and the mountains.

but thanks.

The post What I Learned from My One-Year-Old appeared first on The Next Family.

Danny Thomas
Danny Thomas


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