By: Amy Wise
Is this actually happening? I must be dreaming! Somebody pinch me. OH MY GOD…after FOUR LONG years we are going to trial! Justice is going to prevail. Finally! We lost our store, our health, our finances, our credit, our peace of mind, our faith in the system, our trust in authority, our dream. (click here for that sordid story) BUT, for all that we’ve lost, we’ve also gained so much, and I’m truly overwhelmed by it all. Strength, love, determination, support, generosity, and –last but not least –faith. What more could I ask for out of life? What more?
And then there’s my marriage. Wow. Who knew when Jamie and I got married 18 years ago that the strength we gained from our interracial struggles would give us the strength to get through this madness!? Now, after all that we’ve been through, we are ready for the fight of our lives. Trial. Ready to get up on the witness stand and speak from our hearts. Ready to get justice for a dream destroyed. Ready to stomp out the injustice of promises broken. Ready to take our lives back!
I choose to stop being a victim. I choose to stop being destroyed. I choose to move on. I choose to live my new dream. I choose to live MY life.
I used to concentrate on all that was taken away, but now I’m embracing all that’s coming my way. I’m surrounded by love from family and friends who continue to rally by my side. Love can do wonders in the darkest of times because now all I see is LIGHT! The trial is just a detail to be crossed off the list, a blip on the radar, so to speak. I took back my life when I embraced all the love, and let go of the anger and hate. When I sit on that stand and look into the eyes of attorneys who continue to try and take me down, I’m going to think of all of you who are in my life and have helped me stay so strong. You know who you are, and I send you my love, because without you I’d be curled up on the floor. Probably checked in somewhere, wearing a jacket with belts, and white all over the walls! You have lifted me up and made me whole, and given me a new lease on life. Today I say thank you from the bottom of my heart, because your love has gotten me through.
So yes, this week is our trial, and we will fight for what’s right, because this is MY life, not theirs.
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Originally published on The Seattle Lesbian
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