Free shipping over $99 | Interest Free *no credit check* financing is available!

Urban Dweller: Wishing in One Hand…

by The Next Family March 07, 2011

By: Danny Thomas

Stay-at-home dad

If the weather holds, we’ll have missed the point…

here’s what’s been going on…
time’s are tough, it’s winter, money’s tight.
life is busy, there isn’t enough time or cash to do all the things I want to do.
but, we are settling in to 2011 after wrapping up a year of tremendous adjustment and accomplishment.
I have been spending time reflecting…
no, that’s not exactly true, I have been trying to find time to reflect —
on finding myself here, now, at this point in my life, approaching 40. And on where we are as a family in a new place, ready to plant new roots, start new careers, begin school, and dance lessons, and soccer.
My babies are growing up – I have a five-year-old and a two-and a half-year old.
How am I ever going to keep up?
I need 12 more hours in the day,
I wish I had time to play music and rebuild guitars.
I wish I had time to go out and have drinks with friends – maybe see some live music or take in a movie.
I wish I could spend an afternoon at the spa getting a mani/pedi, a facial, and a massage.
I wish I had time to sit around the house watching old movies and having a lazy day.
I wish I had time to write more.
I want to build a computer.
I wish I had time to read more, I have books and books I want to read — parenting books, a couple biographies, fiction and non-fiction, a giant stack.
I want to get all those stacks of paper in the office organized.
I want to exercise more – get fit – so I have a better chance of keeping up with those kids.
I wish I had the dollars to afford to do all of that stuff.
But I also know that getting hung up on what I don’t have is an insipid and dangerous mental game – as the old saying goes: you can wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one fills up faster. Sometimes I just have to fantasize a little, and make a list or two of what I’d like to do. I also think there is abundance in gratitude, and the more appreciation you have for what you have, the more you see the bounty; and the more you see it the more it comes to you.
I know that may be idealistic, or come across as naïve, but it seems like a natural extension of the laws of physics…like is attracted to like – bountiful thoughts, bountiful energy attract more bountiful energy…I am reminded of the truth of this on a regular basis when putting my girls to sleep; if I am edgy, thinking about all the other things I want to do with my evening or cranky because of a long day, my children take longer to let go and fall asleep. But when I relax with them… well, that is the best way to get them to unwind.
Anyway, knowing on an intellectual, or even an emotional, intuitive level that this is true doesn’t make it any easier to put into practice some days… some weeks…
But I have faith in my blessings and hope for my bountiful life and even on the hard days I find sweetness and delight…
Sacrifice and compromise, character-building, at least that’s what they say…
I guess I just have to get used to this ever-changing life, give up hoping for any notion of ever truly “settling in” and accept the fact choosing to spend my time one way means I don’t get to spend it nine other ways, every time…
And also hold on to the hope that as we progress things will find balance and we’ll work out ways to fit it all in, at least some of the time…

The post Urban Dweller: Wishing in One Hand… appeared first on The Next Family.

The Next Family
The Next Family


Leave a comment

Comments will be approved before showing up.

Also in Parenting

Modern Fitness For the Modern Parent

by The Next Family March 25, 2016


Originally published on The Seattle Lesbian

By Laura King

Life can get busy. With work, kids, family commitments, friends, chores, and the general chaos of everyday life, it can be near impossible at times to sit down for a cup of tea, let alone squeeze in an hour of exercise regularly. However, all things are possible if you set your mind to them. Those that prioritize their fitness nearly...

Continue Reading →

Estate Planning: The Basics For LGBT Families

by The Next Family March 25, 2016

With the passage of marriage equality last year, laws have been quickly changing across the United States. LGBT couples with or without children weren’t just given the right of marriage, they were provided new protections and benefits within their families. All of a sudden, LGBT couples and families had to figure out how to file jointly when it came to taxes, how to add...

Continue Reading →

Representation of Modern Families in Kid-Friendly Entertainment

by The Next Family March 24, 2016 1 Comment


By Alex Temblador

I recently wrote an article for The Next Family called, “Family-Friendly Films That Feature Adoption and Foster Care,” that shared wonderful family films with adoption or foster care story lines. My reasoning behind doing so was because every family deserves a chance to see similar families like theirs represented in various forms of entertainment.

The same can be said of other...

Continue Reading →