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Two Moms: A Change of Plans

by The Next Family February 18, 2011

By: Heather Somaini

lesbian mom and wife pregnant with twins

March 8th – 7:00am

Dr. K was doing rounds that morning and came in to check on Tere.  Not much had changed but he let us continue to progress as is.  We knew Dr. C would come by in a few hours so I opted to run home, take a shower, change into clean clothes, pick up my Mom, and most importantly bring coffee and some “real” breakfast back to the hospital for Tere.  Oh, and I had to remember to bring the cord blood kits!

I can’t tell you how happy I was to have my Mom with me.  After months and months of feeling so alone, I had my best friend, my most trusted confidant, my biggest supporter with me to help.  I was beside myself ecstatic that the timing worked out perfectly and she would be there for her grandchildren’s birth.  I can’t imagine a better gift to either of us.  It made me giddy thinking that she would be able to hold them right after they were born.  And her support of us was extraordinary.  I knew the world would not fall apart on her watch.

We arrived back at the hospital to a flood of emails.  Coincidentally, a good friend of my boss’s went in to labor the same day we did and everyone wanted to know who was going to increase the world’s population first.  Needless to say, we lost.  We spent the rest of the morning hanging out and chatting – just the three of us.  It was such a great time with nothing to do but wait.  Tere was comfortable and hadn’t felt one contraction.  We laughed and told stories and asked my mom’s advice for hours.

A little before noon, Dr. C came by to check on Tere’s progress.  She was still right around 2cm dilated – virtually no change in 18 hours.  Dr. C said it was time to throw in the towel and get the babies out.  She wanted to do a C-section.  She had taken such good care of us; we were well trained to heed her advice.  We readily agreed to the surgery.

It would take almost two hours for them to ready an operating room for our soon-to-be arrivals.  It was now that time started to speed up on me.  I suddenly had to call and email a ton of people to update them on our progress and our new change of plans.  Tere’s good friends Christopher and Bobby wanted to be with us for the birth and started their drive up from Laguna Beach.  My boss was flying back to the states and wanted updates.  My fingers were typing as fast as I could to keep up with the flow of information.

The level of activity from a normal vaginal birth versus a C-section is dramatic.  It increases slowly in volume and intensity, sort of like a pot of water on low heat.  You don’t even notice it at first and then at some point it’s deafening…but I’ll get to more of that later.  The nurses started coming in with paperwork and information.  Each detail had to be explained and then some decision needed to be made.

Christopher and Bobby arrived at the height of activity.  Soon after, the anesthesiologist walked in and introduced himself to Christopher asking if he was the dad.  We all stared at him in silence for a minute and then finally said “no”.  He then moved on to Bobby, shaking his hand and asked if he was the dad.  We all stared at him again and said “no”.  He then looked at all of us and said, “then who’s the Dad?”

Everyone pointed at me and said “she is.”  From the corner of the room, I looked up from my laptop and waved and smiled – “I am”.  That poor man looked incredibly confused.  That was probably the easiest and probably the funniest part of the rest of the day.

Soon after they had me put on those lovely blue scrubs.  What a fashion statement!  There is just no way to look cute in those things.

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