A desperate housewife recently wrote in the advice column Annie’s Mailbox seeking help about her hot bisexual husband.
“I met my husband in college,” the letter begins. “He was outgoing, handsome and a star athlete. We now have two beautiful babies and, I thought, a perfect marriage.”
But, as is often the case, not everything is it seems.
The letter continues: “A month ago, we had dinner with a couple we’ve known for years. One of them said something about ‘bisexuals,’ to which I replied, ‘There is no such thing. You are either gay or straight.’ Everyone looked uncomfortable.”
It wasn’t until the next day when the woman realized why the people are her dinner table had responded the way they did.
“The next day, my husband told me that he is bisexual,” the woman says. “He said he’d had a relationship with another man in college before he met me. But he reassured me that I had nothing to worry about because he loves me and has no desire to be with anyone else of either sex.”
The woman goes on to say she found her husband’s confession deeply troubling and she wishes he had never told her.
“I’ve been upset ever since,” she writes. “I believe my husband when he says he is not interested in anyone else, but I have to ask, is there really such a thing as ‘bisexual’? My sister says that is just what people claim before they come out as gay. And second, how can I trust my husband when he kept this secret from me for so long?”
She continues by saying she does not want to go to couple’s counseling for fear that her husband may decide to leave her.
“What if we go and then, just like my sister says, this bisexual stuff is all bogus and he decides he is gay?” he asks. “I don’t want to end our marriage. I just want to turn back the clock so I can think of my husband the way I did before.”
The letter is signed, “Confused Wife.”
The good folks at Annie’s Mailbox get right down to business with their response.
“Your sister is giving you damaging and incorrect information,” they said. “Decades ago, people may have believed that one was either gay or straight, and that bisexuals were simply hiding their true selves, but this is no longer considered accurate.”
The response continues: “We have come to understand that sexuality is more complicated and that some people are attracted to both sexes. And one’s sexual orientation has nothing to do with remaining faithful to one’s partner.”
“Your husband is the same man you fell in love with. If you trust him, your marriage is solid,” the response concludes. “But if you find that your marriage is floundering over this, consider counseling from someone who specializes in LGBT marriages and can address your specific concerns.”
Alternatively, she could take the advice of queer performance artist Peaches: