Fresh off his ego-crushing loss in Iowa, Donald Trump is rebranding himself as a champion for LGBTQ equality.
The billionaire wants the queer people of America to know that he loves you. He supports you. He thinks you’re just great! No, really, he does! You’re tremendous! And if you vote for him, he’ll convince everyone else to think so, too! He’s a businessman, after all!
Reporter Sue O’Connell recently had the distinct privilege to ask Mr. Trump about his stance on LGBTQ issues. Here’s what she said: “I’m a lesbian. We’ve had some great progress for the gay and lesbian community. When President Trump is in office can we look for more forward motion on equality for gays and lesbians?”
Trump wasted no time telling her what he thought she wanted to hear.
“Well, you can,” he said. “We’re going to bring people together, and that’s your thing, and other people have their thing. We have to bring all people together and if we don’t we’re not going to have a country anymore.”
Did you hear that gay people? Donald Trump wants to you have “your thing.” And other people can have “their thing.” In Donald Trump’s America, everyone can have “their thing”… so long as they aren’t Mexican, Muslim, disabled, and so on, and so on…
Either Trump has had a complete 180-degree change of heart since he boasted that he absolutely, positively does not support same-sex marriage in 1999… and in 2000… and in 2011… and in 2013… Or he’s just trying to appeal to New Hampshire voters, of which 67 percent say they support same-sex marriage.
Watch Donald J. pat himself on the back for being an advocate for LGBT people in the video below. Or don’t.