No Friends To Celebrate With, Pharma-Bro Throws Himself Lonesome Online Birthday Party

Graham Gremore

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Pharma-bro Martin Shkreli turned 33 yesterday and to celebrate he threw himself a party.

Literally. Just himself. He was the only person in the room.

Since he doesn’t have any friends in real life, Shkreli invited his Twitter followers to join him for the celebration via webcam:

https://twitter.com/MartinShkreli/status/710665145429659648

The shindig was held on the the platform Blab Beta, where Shkreli regularly streams live chats with anyone who wants to drop in an say hi, and it included a cake with a picture of a $100 bill with his face on it:

https://twitter.com/MartinShkreli/status/710600421564420096

The price-gouging douche, who was recently hexed by a coven of New York witches, told followers that he is excited to be turning 33, comparing it to the human gestation process:

https://twitter.com/MartinShkreli/status/710516753047146497

The whole thing is so incredibly sad that we almost feel sorry for Shkreli.

Almost.

Related: Martin Shkreli Resents Being Labeled “Pharma Bro,” Says You’re All Just A Bunch Of Haters

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