Lesbian Moms: My Second Day of Parenthood

By: Heather Somaini

March 8th, 3:30pm

Dr. C saw us go by and stopped us with “Oh good, you’re here so I can tell you what happened.” That never sounds like something good has just transpired. My Mom and I stood there listening to Dr. C explain that Tere’s postpartum hemorrhaging was fairly severe. It usually happens when a woman has one of a few complications like advanced maternal age, gestational diabetes, or multiple gestation (aka twins). Tere had all three. She explained that making a quick decision and opting for the hysterectomy was a good one and Tere had only lost a liter of blood. A liter of blood??!?%&!? How in the world could THAT be a good thing? She shared a recent similar case with us that caused a lot of complications for a new mom so she was happy that Tere made a quick decision and would recovery quickly. “Quickly” is a relative term here, isn’t it? Dr. C also told us that a very unusual thing had occurred where the placenta from one of the twins had started to grow into the uterine wall. It could have created a host of problems and they would need to monitor her for the next year, but overall, catching it now was fortuitous.

I went to see Tere in the recovery room and to give her an update on the babies. To this day, she has no recollection of that conversation or pretty much anything that happened for the rest of the day. I handled a bunch of paperwork when my Mom said that I needed to eat. I looked at her like she had two heads. I was fine and besides, I needed to email everyone the good news about the babies being born! Of course I had a pre-set email that was all ready to go as long as I attached a picture and filled in all the pertinent info like birth weights, etc. My Mom allowed me this one task and then dragged me down to the hospital cafeteria. We ordered some food, sat down and I almost passed out. You have to love Moms – when they’re right, they’re right. I was exhausted, dehydrated, starving, and had been running on adrenalin for hours.

As the congratulatory emails rolled in, I devoured my food. I’m sure it was comical to watch. I ran upstairs to hand-off the cord blood kits to the messenger when my brother arrived with my niece in tow. It was awesome to have not only my Mom’s support but his, too. Over the next few days, my sister-in-law, my nephew, and my Dad would all arrive to see our family’s newest additions. It was an amazing time.

I came back up later and got my first lesson in feeding babies from the nurses. They trained me well. Tere was finally moved into a regular room later that evening and I was able to have both of the babies brought down to her. It was honestly the first time she got to see them. We spent a quiet evening with them and then the lovely, gorgeous, scrumptious Judy E. arrived. I can’t say enough about her. Judy is Dr. C’s right hand woman and for some reason she likes me and Tere and adores the twins. It was the perfect end to our day when Judy arrived to sit awhile and hold the babies. She came after visitors’ hours so she knew it would be quiet. It was perfect.

March 9th, 9:00am

I arrived at the hospital for our second day of parenthood. I was reasonably rested, showered, and had my coffee in hand. The day before had been a little rough but Tere and the babies were alive and healthy. Life was good. I was on Cloud Nine and couldn’t wait to see what was in store for me at the hospital.

My Mom and I entered Tere’s room and I smiled when I saw her with our daughter. I asked if Free was still in the nursery when Tere said “They took him to the NICU at midnight.”

My heart sank; our bumpy journey was not letting up.

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