Marriage Gets Boring

By: Brandy Black

New Year's Eve

January 10th is an important date to my wife and me because it marks over a decade (13 years to be specific) that we have been together –so long that we have gotten into ruts, come out of them, and gone back in a few times around.  I recently made the realization that we could use a change, some change, anything really.  I don’t know about other couples but it is so easy to fall into the trap of complacency, going to the same places, eating the same things, seeing the same people, re-creating the same date or not going on any at all.  We need something to rock our world sideways.  Being a child of hippies (ex-hippies), I learned to embrace change early on.  I crave it and if it doesn’t happen every couple years, I get restless.  In my childhood, change mostly represented moving from state to state, city to city; but in my adulthood, it can be anything from running a marathon to starting a business to eating a new dish.  Which brings me to our recent endeavor.

We went to dinner with a couple foodie friends of ours last week.  They have a much more sophisticated palate than we, as we tend to stick with basic items, mostly vegetarian.  If we are really daring we may order chicken or fish.  Susan told me that the wife of the pair suggested this restaurant (Cleo in Hollywood) because she thought we should be more adventurous with our food.  I couldn’t agree more. So it was settled; we handed the menus over and let them run the show for us from start to finish.  The only thing I chose was my cocktail (a Sidecar, of course, and let me tell you, they are best at Cleo).  The rule was that they wouldn’t tell us what we were eating until we tried it.  It was one tasty morsel after the next; we had lamb and beef cheek tagine and eggplant (never liked it until that night) flatbread.  It was an absolute thrill stepping outside of our routine.  Susan was the ultimate trooper given that she rarely eats meat.

It stuck with me the next morning.  I’m ready to break out.  A while back I wrote about date day, picking a date from a jar and doing it no matter the cost, the mood, the weather, no excuses.  I’m ready to say yes instead of no, to tackle fear head on, to buck the system, to break my rules, to be silly, to slow down and speed up all at once. It’s time for a transformation and Susan is all in!

Thanks G&A for knocking the wind out of us. We’re headed to Vegas…

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